Welcome to The Tribe.
Your Humble Ruler, Rajah Cheech Beldone, King of the Gypsies.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Variety Pack

Yeah, OK, so I got a couple deals I need to get out here.

First of all, you got to love these pigfuckers that have the little Buddha talisman on their motorcycles.

Dear Lord Buddha,
Protect me and watch over me.
As I drive like a stupid selfish ignorant cocksucker and endanger everyone with the misfortune to be driving in my vicinity.

I haven't posted a recipe for a while because, well, who gives a fuck, really?
But this was so extraordinarily fucking awesome, it really blew my mind.
So I had been reading about the various health benefits of yams (as opposed to sweet potatoes, which are actually different things, I never knew that, apparently sweet potatoes are in the Americas, and yams are in Africa and Asia).

We never ate them when I was growing up, I think it's a little too cold for them at home, although you can buy them.
Anyways, I always liked them.
If you know anything about your Taiwan history, you'll know that yams are a notorious Poor Food here for anyone who grew up in the middle of the last century, or anyone whose parents did.
Apparently, when the Nipponesers were running the place

Most of the insanely abundant rice harvest was exported back to the bokoku, and as is pretty much the norm in areas occupied by hostile foreigners, the locals, including the people who grew it, were left with barely enough to survive.
So it was common practice to chop up yams, which grew like mad and weren't sought after by (Little Anthony and) the Imperials, and throw them in with the rice, to get sufficient chow.
Anyways, I was making some fucking chicken there on Sunday,  and I had these yams.
So I made this, and it was so fucking easy, and tasted SO fucking good, I couldn't believe it.
Also, since I only eat bacon about once a month, this was an excellent way to get it down me neck.
It's a fantastic side dish, and yams are way better for you than pudaydas (sorry Wee Irish).
Give it a crack, you won't be sorry.
Here we go

Pan Fried Yams

Bacon, chopped
1 big red onion (other kinds are OK, but it won't be as tasty), chopped coarsely
Garlic, minced
4 or 5 white/yellow yams, peeled and sliced about 1/2" thick
Salt and pepper

Chop up the bacon and throw it in the frying pan. Stir it and get it going.
Once it's sizzling and starting to render out grease, throw in the onion and garlic.
Mix them all in together (right about now it should smell so fuckin good you'll want to stick a fucking pencil in your eye).
When the onion is soft, lay the yams on top of the whole thing, in as close to a single layer as you can.
Salt and pepper generously (actually when I did it, it turned out all the garlic had sprouted, so I also laid on a good wallop of this excellent garlic salt they got in the supermarket here, it's got parsley in it).
Fold the yams into the rest of the mix so that they're all surrounded and covered.
Cover the pan and reduce the heat.
Cook covered for about 20 minutes, stirring about twice.
The heat should be low enough and the pan greased enough that you don't have any sticking issues.
When the yams are soft, you're done.
Try not to cook them too long or they'll just be mush, which is OK but not as good.

You won't believe how good this is, and making it is easier than slipping on fuckin dog shit in the back yard.

Oh yeah, so me & Cisco got into this Dueling 80s Movie Songs deal.
I came up with this one, which I totally forgot how much I liked at the time, as well as really liking the movie (even though, like most other 80s pop culture I was actually about 10 years older than the targeted teen market).
The movie still holds up pretty darn good too.
Some fuckin cast too, really*.

Also, I used to dress like Bender.


*I totally missed that Andy's old man is played by this fucking guy

who appears in EVERY SINGLE fucking movie shot in Chicago, fuckin John Hughes, gotta love him

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