Welcome to The Tribe.
Your Humble Ruler, Rajah Cheech Beldone, King of the Gypsies.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

One in the head from a boomerang you threw 2 years ago.

First of all, I have to say, I'm about losing my fuckin religion over the zipperheads. Seriously at the end of me chain.
If you get a sudden emergency call from me pleading with you to get over quick to keep me from sticking a lit cigarette in my eye...

I implore you to take it with all seriousness.

Any fuckin ways, that ain't what I really wanted to talk about.
I really wanted to warn you to watch out the shit you say, you won't fuckin believe how it can come back to buttrape you when you least expect it.

So a couple days ago I'm in the middle of heavy negotiations with The Ranette over the potential purchase of certain consumer electronics devices, since her 2 or 3 year old iPod Nano (which she uses at least daily) is well on the road to TU-dom, AND her birthday is coming up in a matter of weeks.

So the decision is being debated as to the appropriate replacement.
The new iPod Nano is considerably improved.

And no, I didn't 'Shop that song onto the display

In one of those weird twists of quasi-human systemization, in many of the reviews, the worst thing they could say about it, the most notable shortcoming is that

"It only plays music, that's all it does"

Now, when I was doing the research, I swear to heaven, the BEST thing about it, at the very TOP of my list, the # 1 benefit was

"It only plays music, that's all it does"

Any fuckin ways, the Ranette, bless her wee cotton socks, as a healthy soon-to-be 14-year-old, is spoiling to maximize her damage, eschewing a simple version update in order to trade up to a complete nother strata of applied technology, to wit, she's all over the fuckin Touch

No Akka Dakka HERE, I've obviously been relegated

Thing is, see, The Ranee, and, to some extent me, aren't' exactly insane at the prospect of her having increased access to the Inskranetx.
Like now, she can get on when she's at home, we don't really see it as being critical for her to check her Gmail when she's halfways home from fuckin school.

You know, it's not like she's me, I got important shit to do on the Afronet...

I know, I know.

So here's where we get to the meat of this post, which will either have you (depending on your personality type, that is, how you scored on the most recently spammed around Which X-Man/Fellowship of the Ring Character/Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle/Nixon Cabinet Member/Beatle/ LifeSaver Flavour/CareBear/Universal Horror Movie Monster/Ex-Husband of Cher Are You??) sighing in relief at the prospect of finally getting to the point, or experiencing a wee letdown because the fun's almost over.

So I'm talking to her the other night, and I say, you know, is it really important that you have more Intronutz access?
And she slowly turns to look me in the eye, and I have this fleeting glimpse into her soul and realize she's been keeping this one back, waiting for just the right moment to play it, like GA's mighty Boxing Glove Arrow

like Rock switching back to his left hand

or the boys

finally crossing streams

she's been waitning for just

And this is it.

And she looks me in the eye and lets me have it.

Hey, better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it, right?

Looks like I'll be picking up a new iPod Touch before Cinqo de Mayo.

In blue.


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