Adventures in the Mysterious East

Hey, it's Friday, let's start with a joke.

How do you know a Taiwanese guy's been in your house?

The tissues are all gone, your homework's done, and everything in the fridge has been made into soup.


I'm killing myself here.


I remember in like 1984 when I was in Hong Kong, some of us from home were over there working on a movie for Golden Harvest, directed by Sammo.

Here he is about to get a shitkicking from Bruce:

Anyways, as is their way, Sammo, being the director, and quite the fuckin wheel in Honkers, spent a lot of time wining and dining us.

We more than once went down to Harbour Park after a big dinner and got on board his yacht to take a moonlight cruise around the harbour, eating fruit and drinking champagne.


No, I ain't making this up.


Anyways, the reason I bring this up? Uh, I forget.
Oh yeah, one night we were at this real swanky resto, and it was the kind of a deal where the dishes are all pricey as fuck and very special cuisine and all, but really the point was just to gross out the unwary foreigner.

So, you know, there was snake (no biggie, I'd had it before, yeah, it tastes like chicken), and all kinds of other crap.

And then they bring out this dish and say its "cat".

And I'm like, well isn't THAT living up to the old stereotype!

Turns out it was actually civet cat, which is the same thing as coatimundi (the animal, not the guy from Kid Creole and the Coconuts), is that right?

Which is sort of a cousin to a raccoon, right?


This was, obviously long before they were using civet cats to crap out coffee beans they could then charge like a billion fucking bucks a pound for (and who was the fucking mental case to first think that one up, huh???).